Attack of Girlie Zim
by cgaussie
Summary: **set in Hi Skool** Zim thinks up a new plan to get the males of the Skool to hang on his every word, but is it really worth the trouble...? Bwa-ha!


Attack of Girlie Zim  
By: Cartman's Girl  
  
Notes: Oh this is… this is truly evil. But it was so much fun!! I hope you guys enjoy it!  
  
~*~  
  
His eyes lay silent, from his seat off the side of the used to be playground. Eyes hidden behind contacts glanced from student to student, observing like he had always done since he had landed on the planet all those years before. He was here on a mission, to take control of the planet. Of course, none of it had worked out yet. He sighed heavily as he saw some more fellow students, now in the mid years of Hi Skool, talking and such. Some glanced at him, and how could they not? Zim's wig had been replaced by a longer wig, since he had increased in height due to his time on Earth and it's gravitational pull, he was taller, and with his height grew his antennae as well. They were now longer, meaning his old wig could no longer hide them. So, he now had a longer wig which had hair tied back in a small pony tail hanging down his back.  
  
His clothing was pretty much the same, since he didn't feel like changing his Invader Uniform, and the uniform grew with him, as it was supposed to. Of course, his fellow classmates found this just plain disgusting since all of them had a change of clothing at some point or another to suit their bodies changing. Especially the females. Zim had taken note on how all the male student's voices had lowered, and the females now sprouted what they called 'breasts' from their chests. These 'breasts' seemed to interest the males very much; thus resulting in bludges and messes.   
  
Zim smirked as he saw Zita walk past Chuck and Spoo, Chuck passing out and Spoo just grinning stupidly. Zita was one of the more popular girls, and seemed to get a lot of attention. Whatever she wore, was the hippest fashions and being around her was 'cool'. Of course, Zim had no purpose to be cool. Invaders didn't NEED to be cool. He then narrowed an eye as other boys soon followed suit, passing out through blood loss or just plain stupidity as the girls went about their girlie things.  
  
"Hmmm…." He observed closer, and got flipped off by Mary since he had been staring at her particularly weirdly. She mouthed the word 'freak' to her friends and they walked away. "That's it!" Zim's eyes widened as an idea hit his oddly shaped head. "I'll use the power of female charms upon the males of this Skool, and soon they'll all be slobbering piles of… GOO  when I'm done with them! Yes… first the Skool, then the town, then the country, THEN I SHALL RULE THE WORLD!!"  
  
The yard went especially quiet, since Zim was now screaming at the sky of his plans of world domination. They just brushed it aside as Zim's usual hunger for power speeches and they went amongst their business. All but one of course. Well, yeah one. Dib Membrane stood across from Zim, slumped up against the cafeteria hall. Sat on the ground besides him was Gaz, playing her GS3 Ultra Mega Premium Gold set. Dib had also had a slight change of appearance. Since now he was able to have facial hair, a goatee sprouted from his chin, and a thin French-like moustache lay above his lip. His hair still had the scythe, but now it kept slumping into his face. He still had a black jacket, and a blue shirt, but his boots had changed muchly; and he now wore a utility belt.  
  
"I know he's up to something, Gaz… I just know it…" he spoke to his sister, who was rarely giving him any attention, as normal. Gaz's gaze didn't leave her game screen, her purple hair still in the same style kept in spot. As for her clothes, purple and black striped stockings covered her legs, and she wore exceptionally large boots over her feet. She wore black clothing mostly. Black skirt, black top, black jacket with long sleeves and long curly cuffs, and her skull head necklace hung around her neck as it always had. Course, now she had black mascara, lip stick, nail polish, y'know. It's a wonder her hair wasn't black.  
  
"But whatever it is, I'll find out! You can bet on that." He kept on speaking, Gaz paused her game and glared up at her older brother.  
  
"I know Dib, I know." Somehow she sounded nastier now grown up, since she had a lot of practice. "You'll save the world and not get a word of thanks from anyone, now _SHUT UP_ before I impale your head with a bike pump." Her eyes gazed down upon her game again, and she continued. Dib looked down at her, and looked back at where Zim sat. His eyes locked with his mortal enemy's eyes, and they glared at each other for a while.  
  


Well until Zita walked past and Dib passed out through pure stupidness.  
  
~*~  
  
"Love shack! Baby love shack! Love shack! Baby love shack!!" Zim was used to coming home and finding his robot GIR doing crazy stuff, but this would have to be one of the worst. GIR had female make up applied to his dog suit, and was wearing a bikini and singing to a spoon as if he were a pop star, while stood on the sofa. Of course, the house was a mess. Food packets of Pizza, tacos, Poop Cola cans and other assorted goods were spread across the room. He groaned.  
  
"Computer…. Clean up GIR's mess." He announced as he took his wig off, his long antennae springing out, glad to be free of the musty hair. Zim peeled his contacts off and placed them in their case, and walked through the room as robotic arms from the ceiling were cleaning. GIR noticed his master's presence, dropped the spoon, leapt out of his dog suit and bikini and followed Zim down into the Main Control Room of the Lab underground.  
  
"It's ingenious GIR! You should see how pathetic those Earthanoid worm monkey makes react to girlie stuff! One walks by and they become a slobbering mass of goo! Their brains seem to not function anymore, and they can barely speak! Imagine it! The WHOLE WORLD bowing before me! I will finally have made the Tallest proud of me and I can get off this STUPID planet!" Zim was speaking to GIR, who for once was kinda listening. On the computer screen was that of a human female, and all these guys around her drooling stupidly.  
  
"Hehehe! Baywatch!" GIR declared, pointing to the girl. Zim rolled his eyes in disgust, he still had no idea why GIR enjoyed human entertainment. Then again, he rarely had any idea what GIR meant by his every day moves. He pressed a button and the screen went blank, then he turned to GIR.  
  
"So, do you want in on what I'm going to _do_, GIR?" Zim asked, the tips of his gloved fingers brushing against the other. The robot just stared back, blankly. "I'll take that as a yes." Zim walked across the room and pulled a lever. Then, out from nowhere slid a new uniform. A very, different uniform. A top, if you can call it that made entirely of red leather hang on an invisible clothes hanger. With that, hung a short black leather skirt, fishnet stockings and black boots. Also, another wig, this one longer then the one he wore that day, and in a totally different style. GIR stared at the suit. Zim then turned back to GIR.  
  
"I am to become.. FEMALE!" his voice echoed throughout the lab, for dramatic effect. There was a long silence afterwards, and seeing he won't get a response from GIR anytime soon, Zim continued. "You see GIR, Irkens have the choice of being either male, or female. Both genes lurk in our DNA." Zim put a hand to his chest modestly as he continued, "So I am to become female, along with a few alterations to my body to make me seem more 'human-esque'-" Zim wiggled his fingers at human-esque, and continued again. "Thus making the male percentage of the population hang on my every word! Brilliant idea, is it not?"  
  
"I want TACOS!" GIR declared happily, and ran from the room shouting about Crazy Taco. Zim sighed as he slumped slightly. He should have expected less from GIR. He turned on his heels and looked at the new uniform. At his will, as Irken Invader Uniforms are able to, his current uniform slid off him onto the floor. Gloves, boots, pants and his shirt and arm guards. It slithered past the new uniform and took it's place on the invisible coat hanger. Zim squirmed somewhat as the new, very tight uniform was pulled over his body. Needless to say, he looked weird.  
  
"Now… for the final touch." He said dramatically, he picked up the new wig and as he placed it atop his head, his body began to change. His somewhat muscular arms and legs somewhat shrank in size, making them slender and luxurious. He became skinnier to fit the leather, yet still able to show the curves of the new body. When Zim's eyes opened, the Irken was no longer male. At least, for now.  
  
"How do those girls _breath_ in these monstrous articles of clothing?!" Zim's voice was now higher pitched, and sounded that of a feminine character, which _she_ now was. Then she took note that there was one thing lacking from the disguise. "Of course… the breast thingies!" she turned on her heels and made her way across the room, and pressed a button. From a circular device, what would appear to be breast implants, tint of green no doubt hung in mid air. Zim lifted her top, since for now it was loose. The implants then attached themselves to her chest, and she quickly pulled her top down, snugly over the addition to her body.   
  
"There! …I think one's lower then the other though…" Zim looked down at her new breasts, but soon lost track of that thought since a loud crash was heard from above in the house. She frowned as she clenched her black gloved fists, which now revealed her green fingers. "GIR…" she snarled.  
  
~*~  
  
Yes, GIR. The little robot with not much of a brain had knocked into the fridge with such a force, it had toppled onto it's side. Food, well, Irken food was across the floor causing puddles of mess on the ground. GIR looked at the food, and glanced around. He started pushing some back into the fallen fridge, well, tried to. It was hard to when the fridge's opening was now facing down on the floor. Then the toilet opened up, and his Master, or should we say Mistress appeared.  
  
"GIR! What have you done in here NOW?! Look at this mess!" Zim leapt off the toilet, landing in a puddle of Irken juice. GIR was affixed in one spot, his eye cams on his Mistress, and he looked very much awed and surprised.  
  
"…Master?" GIR asked, not sure if this was his Master or not.  
  
"You didn't pay attention to anything I said down in the lab, did you?" Zim asked, as she started to pick up some packages that were still intact, and place them on the table. GIR walked up to Zim and watched her as she continued her clean up routine. GIR had always seen his Master do this, usually with small messes he had made. Course, before his Master wasn't a female, or so… pretty before.  
  
"Master… you're so pretty!" the robot declared happily, jumping up and down on one spot. Zim rolled her eyes, but couldn't help but feeling flattered that the robot had noticed the change in her outward appearance.  
  
"Thank you, GIR. Now help me!" Zim snapped. GIR's eyes flashed red, and he saluted his Mistress.  
  
"Yes Sir! I mean… uh…." GIR's eyes faded to blue, "What do I call you?"  
  
"Ma'am, GIR. Ma'am." Zim replied modestly.  
  
"Yes Ma'am!" the robot walked to the fridge and up righted it. Zim, for one was surprised. GIR would have normally not have helped at all, then it hit her. Was it that her feminine looks and charm even worked on a robot? If that was possible, she must be _very_ attractive to human males. A grin crossed her face.  
  
"Excellent…" she grinned evilly, turning to face the window that looked directly at the next door neighbour's wall. "YOU DON'T HAVE LONG BEFORE ALL OF YOU ARE KNEELING BEFORE ZIM! YOU HEAR ME?! NOT LONG AT ALL!!" Zim then erupted into a cackle of laughter, joined by GIR who had found the new way his Mistress laughed amusing.  
  
~*~  
  
"What do you mean Zim's left school?!" Dib was shocked to hear the rumour from Melvin, who now had a pierced ear.  
  
"That's what I heard! News is his family moved away just last night, and they don't know when he'll be back!" Melvin replied, licking a purple lolly pop he had in his hand. Melvin hadn't changed much really, still a looser 'n all that. Course, his clothing now consisted of a dark orange parka and blue jeans over black shoes. He still had a love of lolly pops, which could hardly be compared to Keef's love of squirrels.  
  
"No way!  No way!" Dib was at a loss for words, other then 'No way'. How could Zim had left without gloating about it? Could he really just up and leave without telling anyone, not even him? He frowned. "This is all part of his plan! Get us all happy he's gone and the moment we don't know what's happening WHAM! He'll be ruler of Earth and we'll be cleaning his shoes with our TOUNGES!" Melvin was quick to back off, and run away from Dib into the crowded Hi Skool hallway. Dib sighed.  
  
"I gotta stop doing that." He said to himself, and started walking to class. He then noticed, on the ground there were many blood spots. And I mean many MANY blood spots. As if the hall had been sprinkled with red paint during the night, as well as the ceiling, walls and locker doors. "Hmm… Zita must be wearing that see through skirt again." Dib murmured to himself. He shuddered at the memory of that day. Especially when Gaz had passed out. Then he reached the classroom and he saw the reason why there was blood almost everywhere.  
  
"…ZIM?!" Dib wasn't sure if it was Zim, or another alien sent to be in his place, either way, the female alien-like figure was sat on Zim's desk, legs crossed and filing her nails, painted red with the tips a bright purple. She lifted her gaze from her nails at Dib, blew on the nails then continued filling. She seemed oblivious to the fact that every single boy in the room had his eyes planted on her. The curves of her body, the raven black hair that hung down over the curves, as well as the tight clothing that showed _off_ the curves. She sighed, sounding bored as Dib took his seat, which was across the room. He then felt his nose.   
  
"…blood? How'd I get a blood nose?" Dib looked at his hand, then quickly got a tissue from his utility belt and held it to his nose. The students quietened down as their teacher, Mr. Scolex entered.  
  
"Class, we have a new student in class just as Zim left our Skool yesterday. You may have… noticed… her…" Mr. Scolex stared blankly at the female, before she gazed up at him and winked slightly, slowly sliding off the desk and taking her place on the seat. Brian, who sat next to the girl was soon a withering pile of goo on the floor. In other words, passed out. "Ahem, yes. This is our new student, her name… Zima Evil. Class, Zima. Zima, w-would you come up to the class and… tell us about yourself?"  
  
"If I must." Zim replied, grinning at the pathetic teacher hadn't noticed the similarities in skin condition and all. She got off her seat and stood in the front of the class, surveying the looks she was getting from every male, minus Brian for reasons, in the class. Even surprisingly, Dib. "I, am Zima. We just moved here from out home town. Soon you'll _all_ be quivering masses of goo like that boy there! You will all bow to me and call me your Queen! YOU HEAR ME?!" She was now stood on Mr. Scolex's desk, and pointing at the class. Chuck passed out after another gush from his nose, since he could see full view of partly up Zim's skirt. "My point is proven. Thank you!" Zim was soon back in her seat, as if nothing had ever happened.  
  
Course, the boys in the class were thrilled to have such a body like Zima's in the class, as for the girls, they had a totally different idea. Zima was retrieving dagger glares all day from the girls. They probably saw Zima as a threat, that she'd end up being the most popular girl in Hi Skool, making them not get anymore attention. Course not all the girls thought this way, only the WAY popular girls. As for the others, they didn't really care. Smart girls.  
  
"Look at her… all prissy 'n fancy looking." Zita muttered to Sarah, from their seats at the back. "I tell you she's sitting like that on purpose." Indeed, Zima was sat with one leg up on her desk, the other one propped up on the chair she was sat on.  
  
"Little whore." Sarah said.  
  
~*~  
  
Ah, lunch! Finally a break from classes, it's what Hi Skool students enjoyed. An hour to eat, socialize, have a smoke if they wanted and so forth. Course, they all had to first sit in the cafeteria and eat before heading to the yard. All the boys were gathered around at a few main tables, the looks on their faces reading that they'd possibly ask Zima to sit with them if given half the chance. Then, she entered the cafeteria. In her gloved hands was the normal trey of mixed food, and she started walking through the crowd.  
  
All the boys seemed to become dumb as she approached them, and then cursed to themselves once she had passed for giving up the opportunity of having her sit besides them. Zima finally sat down at a table by herself, and began poking at the food on the tray. Even in this body, Zim would _never_ eat human food. But she had to make it seem she would, so she picked up the ketchup bottle that was at the table and aimed it at the pile of fries that lay on the tray. She shook the bottle, then began hitting it with her hands.  
  
"Evil ketchup…" Zim muttered to herself, then she remembered seeing GIR rubbing the end of the nozzle, usually it was blocked and rubbing it would cause the block to come loose. So she did just that, and she barely noticed the looks on the faces of all the boys, well, minus Dib since he wasn't paying attention. The sight of a girl who looked as attractive as Zim did, rubbing the tip of a ketchup bottle was enough to get any male worked up, thus it did. Finally the block came unstuck, but too quickly for Zim to react and soon ketchup covered her entire tray, splattering on the table, and onto her leather top.  
  
"Dah!!" Zim threw the bottle away, it connected with Keef's head, thus making the red haired boy, now with braces, fall to the ground. An idea crossed Zim's mind, and she lifted her eyes to see the boys still watching her. She put one elbow onto the table, avoiding the ketchup and motioned to M to come over to her. M looked past him, at his friends then back at Zima and pointed to himself, as if asking it was him she was requesting the company of. Zima nodded in response, then patted the seat besides her. Before Zima knew it, M was sat besides her as quick as a flash. Zima smiled seductively, running one finger through his brown hair.  
  
"What's your name…?" she asked quietly, as if not wanting anyone else to hear what she's saying. And it worked.  
  
"…M…." came the response. Zima looked somewhat confused, since even when she was a male she never understood M's name. But shrugged it off in her mind.  
  
"Right… look, M. Could you do one itsy bitsy little thing for me…?"  
  
"A-anything…"  
  
"Could you wipe the ketchup off my top…?" M looked besides himself, wiping the ketchup off Zima's top meant actually touching her chest, chest meaning the great melons that were attached to her chest (heh, melons). He started to stammer, but giving up on talking he just nodded stupidly as he got a tissue from his pocket. Back at the table he came from, Chuck, Spoo, Melvin and Willy sat there watching.  
  
"What's he doing…?" Chuck asked quietly as he sat how nervous M was now getting, each time the tissue came nearer and nearer to Zima.  
  
"Dude, he's gonna touch her bazoombas!" Spoo declared, so happily it would seem he was the one doing it.  
  
"No way…" Melvin said, still sucking on, now his lolly pop stick. M's tissue was about to touch onto Zima's shirt when suddenly Dib grabbed Zima by the arm, and hauled her from her seat. Good thing too cause M just had a shot of blood spurt from his nose, and he landed face first in the ketchup.  
  
"Release me!! Release me or suffer the raff of ZIM!…A!" Zim almost forgot himself for a moment, but Dib just kept glaring at Zim through his glasses. He turned to the cafeteria, turning Zima with you.  
  
"Don't be fooled! This isn't a _new_ girl, it's ZIM!" he called to the cafeteria. He received blank stares from everyone, minus M since he was still passed out.  
  
"…dude, that doesn't look like Zim." Lorla spoke up from back in the cafeteria.  
  
"It's because he's _dressed_ like a girl, and look, these aren't even REAL!" Dib then grabbed onto one of Zim's breasts and attempted to pull it off, thus getting a sharp cry of pain from Zima, then a slap across his face by her free hand. He hit the ground hard, since not only Zim had slapped him with a hand, but the whole lunch tray of ketchup.  
  
"How _DARE_ you!" Zima screeched, before kicking Dib where it hurt most, and turning and storming from the cafeteria. There was a long silence in the hall, before Melvin, Keef (now awake and ketchup over his face and clothes) and Mathew went up to Dib, looking down at him, still withering in pain.  
  
"…you touched her boobs man." Melvin claimed, pointing his wet lolly pop stick at Dib.   
  
"You… you kick ASS man!" Mathew screeched, hauling Dib to his feet. "I mean you just went for it like that! You didn't mess around or anything! You just went up and BOOM!! Grabbed those melons like they were… melons!"  
  
"Guys… I hope you understand but I am in a _great_ deal of pain right now and even though I've been waiting since Kindergarten to get this kind of praise, I kinda wanna run crying like a little girl to the nurse… which I'm going to do now." Dib ran away from the group, crying hysterically about his family jewels.  
  
~*~  
  
"Can you _believe_ it… he GRABBED me! He touched Invader property that's so personal I didn't even HAVE it until yesterday!" Zim was home, after a day at Skool as Zima. It wasn't easy, she must say. She had received numerous love notes, insulting comments about her 'bazoombas' and behind as well as the girls… she rubbed her black eye painfully and winced as she remembered the bloody battle after Hi Skool. GIR was tending to Zim's wounds with adhesive medical strips that smelt of bacon, he occasionally ate one himself.  
  
"Awww… poor Mistress." GIR said as he planted the last adhesive medical strip on Zima's arm.  
  
"I never _knew_ being a female was so difficult! …GIR, I want to be _me_ again!" Zim got off the couch, standing tall in her base. "I want to be the Zim that everyone fears! The Zim that will RULE this earth not just because of my gender but for my BRAIN and powerful thinking of an Irken Ruler! It will be ME who will please the Tallest, not this girl Zima! But ME! Zim!" Zim turned around to face GIR, who was eating another medical strip. "GIR, when you see me again, I shall be my normal self. Kiss the sweet Zima goodbye, because-"  
  
Zim was cut off, for before she could end her sentence the robot had it's legs wrapped around her neck and was smooching her directly on the lips, as if she had instructed it. GIR soon found him self slammed onto the floor again, laughing hysterically to himself that he had managed to steal a kiss from his Mistress.  
  
"Oh you DISGUSTING robot!!" Zim spat as she wiped her mouth, trying to get the taste of tacos, pizza, anchovies, candy floss, plastic, metal and other disgusting tastes from her mouth. She stormed from the room, then stopped. "Wait… I might use that to get at Dib one last time before I become Zim again…"  
  
~*~  
  
Dib was laid out on his couch, an ice pack covered in towels placed over his lap area. It still throbbed where Zim had struck him with her powerful boot. It crossed his mind that Zim must have played some sort of football game back on his home planet, because he sure had a good kick. Then the door bell sounded.   
  
"…Gaz?" Dib called out, his voice back to normal at least. No response. "Fine, let the sick boy get it…" Dib painfully got to his feet, and went to the door and opened it to greet… "Zim?"  
  
"Hello Dib! I thought I might stop by and see how you're feeling." Zim declared, pushing past the boy and into his house.  
  
"Zim! Get out of here!!" Dib snarled, even though a part of his brain was throwing a party that an attractive girl, alien or not, was in his house. Zim turned and faced him.  
  
"Aw, now why would I do that?  Why on Earth would I do such a silly thing?" Zim asked, walking closer and closer to Dib. With each step she took, Dib took, backing away from the alien.  
  
"I… I'm warning ya, Gaz is in the house and I'll tell her you just wrecked her Game Slave something or other!" Dib shook a finger at Zim, hoping his threat would cause the alien to leave. It didn't. Dib then slammed into the door, he was trapped. Zim then slammed her gloves down on the door, now with Dib face to face with her.  
  
"I just wanted to use my feminine self to annoy you one last time…" Zim said coldly, a grin across her face.  
  
"…what are you going to do…? Lay eggs in my chest?" Dib asked.  
  
"Hahaha – no. This." Zim's hands moved to Dib's face, and pressed her lips seductively against Dib's. Needless to say Dib was shocked at this, he kinda enjoyed it, I mean, his first kiss… but then he remembered. This was an alien! He had no idea how in festered with diseases it might be! Dib pushed against Zim, and pushed the alien off him.  
  
"Argh! How… HOW … WHY!?" Dib wasn't sure what to think of this, Zim just smiled back at Dib, before walking past him, pushing the boy out of her way.  
  
"I had to do something about getting back at you touching Invader property, did I not? Bye Dib!" Zim opened the door, and slammed it after her. Dib was left stood in the room, then glanced down at himself. His shoulders slumped.  
  
"Aw man… this was a new set of pants too…"  
  
~*~  
  
Zim was once again down in _his_ lab. It had been an hour since he had returned to his normal self, and he couldn't feel better. Course, GIR was crying hysterically and hugging the clothes Zim had worn that day while sat in the corner.  
  
"Well… sure maybe this plan didn't work, but I gave it my best! I even sent documentary tapes of it all to the Tallest, and I'm sure they're pleased that I'm stretching the boundaries of what we mighty Invaders can do in order to please them. Yes… they'll probably congratulating themselves on choosing me for this job."  
  
~*~  
  
Red and Purple stared blankly at the recordings, they had sat affixed in the same place since the tapes had arrived for them. Their eyes not daring to leave the screen, as they watched Zima do her work on all she had done that day. Soon the tape came to an end, as it had done many times before. Red and Purple sat there, then turned to each other and declared at the same time,  
  
"I'm gonna watch it again!"  
  
  
The End!


End file.
